How hard is it to crank out mindless popcorn flicks?
Apparently really hard.
Hollywood just bought the rights to make a Magic 8 ball movie.
Seriously.
I am either going to become a screenwriter or buy up the rights to useless things like Hello Kitty or Polly Pockets and wait for Hollywood to write movies about them.
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SUMMER MOVIES
Don't Even Bother...
- Shrek Forever After ~ That is enough, Mike Myers.
- Probably anything in 3-d ~ When will this trend end?
Reliable popcorn flick...
- Salt ~ This movie is getting way too much press because 1) The part was originally written for a male but now a lady is playing the role (GASP!) and 2) The public has an unreasonable obsession with Angelina Jolie. While the plot isn't especially imaginative (1 part "Mission Impossible", 1 part "Bourne" Trilogy) it looks like it could be a good movie.
- Robin Hood ~ Russell Crowe is a pretty reliable action star and this movie looks pretty awesome. Let's just hope that Russell Crowe and Cate Blanchett isn't as awkward on screen as it sounds on paper.
- Toy Story 3 ~ Let me first admit my bias for Pixar. I love them and I really think they can do no wrong (let me also say that I have never seen "Cars"... so this statement can still pretty much stand unchallenged). This one of the few franchises where sequels don't automatically make me gag. I don't know whether it is because it is the magical touch of Pixar or that the characters are endearing--
What the Hell...?
- Macgruber ~ I doubt there are any secrets here. This isn't going to be a breakaway hit or a cult-classic. It is an SNL movie that you will see once and forget ("Ladies Man"? "Superstar"?...) the only thing you will remember will be a handful of quotes and then it will go straight to the bargain bin.
- A-Team ~ This might be a good movie... but it looks like it could be so much better.
Movies That Will Probably Be Awesome...
- Iron Man 2 ~ Everyone says that the trailer for this looks mind-meltingly awesome. The only problem is that for every time the trailer airs-- ten other ridiculous cross-promotional commercials air. This is a grim foreshadowing of a movie that will be rife with product placement. The good news is Robert Downey Jr. has rocked at bringing Tony Stark to the screen. I hope this movie, more than any other this summer, lives up to its potential.
- Get Him To The Greek ~ This is the quasi-sequel to "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" (one of the funniest movies of our time- seriously). Judging from the trailer, seeing "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" isn't necessary. "Greek" won't be as endearing as "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" (because it is lacking the amazing Jason Segal) and I doubt the humor will be as varied as "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" (again-- because it is lacking the amazing Jason Segal) but it will be funny. The Aldous Snow character is hilarious.
- Ramona and Beezus ~ Holy Crap! This looks amazing.
- Scot Pilgrim versus the World ~ This movie is based on a comic book... and my life.
GASP-- She said Whaaaaaa?
- Knight and Day ~ Tom Cruise playing a high-strung crazy person? Have the past eight years been one giant method study? If one can get over their hatred for Tom Cruise... I think there is a possibility they will like this movie. I myself am still debating. Hating him is so comfortable--like a warm blanket. I don't know if I am ready to give that up yet...
- Babies ~ Yeah, I said it! Despite my documented disdain for infants- this movie is adorable. It documents the life of four different babies living wildly different lives on different corners of the planet. I watched the trailer couldn't deal with the adorableness ("Awwww look at the babies... they think they're people!).
- Killers ~ Friendships have been lost because of my support for this film but I remain firm: this movie is going to be good. It looks to be in the same vein as "Romancing the Stone." Killers is going to be funny and ridiculous. DEAL WITH IT!
